Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself

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In turn, this helps readers learn more about themselves and how to find better relationships with others – which is especially useful for codependents who have spent much of their lives in abusive or otherwise unhealthy romantic partnerships. This can help you break free from this type of unhealthy behavior pattern – allowing you to take control over your life once again as a healthy individual overall. What are the dangers of codependency? Annette Jolin’s Don’t Feed the Monkey Mind is another excellent resource for those struggling to find better ways of coping with addiction or other forms of self-destructive behavior. Whitfield goes on to explain that these early life experiences are often repressed or denied because they were so painful – but this has severely negative consequences when forming adult relationships with other people by creating boundaries between what we have experienced in our pasts and who we want to be now.

Rosenberg explains that people who grow up surrounded by addiction, mental illness, or other forms of abuse are often taught unhealthy patterns of relating with others as children – which manifests itself later in life through subconscious decisions made during adult relationships. Also, based on interactions with other families who went through the same thing, she was able to gather so much information, which she shared in this book. Barbara also shared some exercises to help children understand the behavioral patterns of their parents. This is a great resource for people who believe that they may be dealing with an addictive personality and feel the need to find better-coping skills moving forward, especially if you’re not sure where else to start when it comes to seeking out professional help or other resources in your life. 9. Love and Addiction: Lessons Learned from Romance, Relationships & Recovery – Adia Victoria The main emphasis of these various treatment modalities is on altering how the codependent person views themselves and their relationships.The book explored the basic idea that certain women have and the attraction to unnecessarily clinging to and having total dependence on their relationships. In the course of their relationships, they often neglect their own needs and well-being.

There are five main roles that codependent people can fall into, including the victim, rescuer, caretaker, rebel, and lost child. Marks, A. D. G., Blore, R. L., Hine, D. W., & Dear, G. E. (2012). Development and validation of a revised measure of codependency. Australian Journal of Psychology, 64(3), 119-127. We do have complete power over our own behavior and how much of someone else’s bad behavior we are willing to put up with. Lazare Shadzeka is a Board Certified Psychiatric Mental Health Nurse Practitioner via the American Nurses Credentialing Center, with privileges in Maryland and Washington DC. He completed his Bachelor of Science in Nursing degree in 2014, in the renowned Marymount University and while pursuing a calling of serving the adult, elderly and vulnerable communities, he decided to further his education, consequently receiving his Master of Science in Nursing Degree with honors from Walden University. Lazare has accumulated over eight enriching years in the provision of holistic care to a wide variety of clients, with psychiatric conditions. This is the story of a woman who survived a childhood of loneliness and bullying but carried its painful legacy into adulthood. Her journey to healing from low self-esteem and suicidal feelings comes after the birth of her three children and provides a role model for anyone recovering from a painful past. She distinguishes between inherent self-worth and dysfunctional programming from the early years.

Shannon Moore, ADT

Codependency often starts in childhood, where this pattern of behavior is shown to be normal by the adults around them. The concept of codependency does still apply to families with substance abuse issues but is also used to refer to other situations too. The main consequence of codependency is that “[c]odependents, busy taking care of others, forget to take care of themselves, resulting in a disturbance of identity development” (Knudson & Terrell, 2012). The author speaks from personal experience about living with multiple addicts in the same family. She describes the actions to expect from an alcoholic and discusses ways of dealing with them. She also talks about to take care of oneself and other members of the family as well as how to start the path to recovery. This is a must-read for anyone who wants to read up on codependency but doesn’t know where to start.